Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12
9 9 Two are better than one,
Because they have a good reward for their labor.
10 10 For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.
But woe to him who is alone when he falls,
For he has no one to help him up.
11 11 Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm;
But how can one be warm alone?
12 12 Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him.
And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
Because they have a good reward for their labor.
10 10 For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.
But woe to him who is alone when he falls,
For he has no one to help him up.
11 11 Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm;
But how can one be warm alone?
12 12 Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him.
And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
Really struggling to push through today in a Godly mentality. Spent the majority of my month being a slave to the anxiety my home creates and doing chores and so the last thing I wanted to do was to attend lifegroup when I could rather spend my time with people I enjoy. My attitude clearly reflected this, as it is every week and they've seen me this way so many times they probably didn't notice it. I really feel distant and rebellious from God every attendance so I just feel drained afterwards.
I'm always feeling depressed after lifegroup partly due to the time that is wasted and the good relationships that I fantasise but become too cautious to initiate. Ironically, I decide to start this reading plan and the first devotional already hit me. By my paranoia, not trusting anyone I am serving my own selfish comfortability rather than serving others in fellowship. I am not placed in God's kingdom to stay comfortable but to genuinely seek Him and worship him even when my selfish desires don't want me to. God designed His Church or companionship, for intimacy, for vulnerability. I'm not any of those.
No comments:
Post a Comment